HARMONIOUS RELATIONS

I’ve thought lots about a couple of problems I’m attempting to solve for myself here. The first is how to make my cosmologic theories more accessible. Okay, so, you caught me! Don’t call them “cosmologic theories.” Maybe call them my educated guesses.

So I’ve decided that every other post will encompass my personal feelings based on speculations and experience. [NOTE: This was a good idea. It’s important to come down to earth with examples others may grasp, but though I will continue to periodically insert posts that are what I call “human centered,” I will mostly build up my theory of perspective and consciousness on this website.]

This post is about all the hostility we see in the news between police officers and citizens they’ve been empowered to police.

I have to make the admission that I look like a white female, though if you examine my DNA, like most of us, you’d probably find a Heinz 57. That said, I have never, that I can recall, had an overtly continuous disagreement with an officer that continued for any length of time. Did they ever appear to dis me? Yes. But I believe only relationships exist, not individuals. And relationships require some form of exchange.

When an officer confronts me the first thing I think of is: My God, this man, or woman, has set themselves up to take a bullet for me that might leave their children without parents, but they know who they are and are willing to do this. I’m tearing up now. I don’t think I have the ability to make that kind of sacrifice. As a result, they are my heroes.

Do I really think this every time I come in contact with a police officer? No. But it’s the attitude, the relationship I wish to form. What does that mean? It means, if I truly understand the sacrifices another makes for me, then I understand them somewhat. At that point, empathy exudes from every pore in my body when I confront them. They get that I know who they are and what they stand for.

Once I treat them with empathy, the empathy comes right back. And this isn’t just true for policemen or policewomen, it’s true—I believe—for all human beings. No matter how we’ve lost our way, that empathy is built into us.

Do all police officers act empathetically with citizens? Of course not. They’re human. And all us humans are somewhat lost to that spark of empathy within us.

At least one person in a relationship has to exhibit that spark. But ideally it must come from both sides.

An empathetic person is one who isn’t afraid of becoming vulnerable. And quite frankly, that’s the biggest fear in most of us. It’s what—I believe—blocks the compassion we feel for others and others feel for us.

So, the biggest sin—if you want to call it that—in the abuse of one person by another, is not the actual physical violence, but the unwillingness to become vulnerable. The unwillingness to demolish all judgment about another and face them anew, believing in the good–the empathy that will surely surface within them.

When an individual is unwilling to admit vulnerability or to see the good in others no matter how those others are believed to have misbehaved, then all is lost. For what is this world about anyway when we’ve lost the ability to further the play [Carse, Finite and Infinite Games] and for that we must exhibit our willingness to become vulnerable to one another.

To wrap this topic up, I recommend reading J. Krishnamurti (K). One does not have to cram as we do in exams, or force a behavior on ourselves to let go, to let ourselves become vulnerable. Vulnerability exists just as Freedom, Trust, and Love do. We do not have to force ourselves to learn these things. We do not need to travel in order to arrive. The end is always here within us. According to K, the ends are in one’s intentions.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: